He Put His Mouth Where?

So I have finally reached the halfway point in the new play I am writing.

As of last weekend, I had one scene to go. However, it was a doozy. The play features two hetero couples -- one modeled in part on the McCanns, who have returned to England and gone back to work after their daughter disappeared in Portugal; the others are an English romance novelist whose baby may have Down's syndrome, and her partner, an amoral American venture capitalist who likes to have sex in public places. The working title is Beyond Repair.

The play makes use of split scenes, which I hadn't used much before, but turn out to be really fun if handled carefully. The big turning point is this big scene at the end of the first half, where the couples meet for dinner at a fancy restaurant, and have to wait in the bar for their table. Up to this point, we mainly have scenes between the couples, or between the women. This is the first time we get them mixing in all kinds of combinations. A few major things happen - one of them which will (as will be clear in a second) be rather scandalous - and things are twisted about for a healthy and eventful (and somewhat unexpected) second half.

I'd held off on writing the failed dinner scene until this weekend, as I knew it would take a long burst of uninterrupted writing. I started this afternoon and finished just after 8 p.m. And I'm only mentioning it now cos the scene contains what surely must be the most disgusting stage direction I've ever put to paper:

Adam disengages and stands up, wiping his mouth on his sleeve.

If that's not giving too much away about one of the twists.

Now, I was just thinking: would I be as disgusted by this stage direction if it were happening between two men, rather than a man and a woman? And the answer, assuming the characters have similar backstories to those in my new piece, is most certainly yes.

Man, do I love when a new piece is in a hot place. I want to get on into the second half. But I'm going to need a meal first. No failed dinner for me!